I came inside from a morning on the beach. Our family was on our annual vacation, and we were thoroughly enjoying the beautiful South Carolina sunshine and waves. I started making lunch when I picked up my phone and refreshed my email inbox.
There it was: an email regarding an upcoming speaking engagement that I was super excited about. I tapped on the email and read, “We regret to inform you that we are unable to approve your request to become an instructor…” The email went on to outline all the qualifications I lacked and how I fell short of their standards. Immediately, the dialogue in my head started to include words like worthless, inadequate, imposter, and fraud. I began having second thoughts about this speaking opportunity that just moments before I would have told you was an amazing, God-appointed opportunity.
How did I go from marveling over a fantastic beach day one minute to feeling defeated and insignificant the next?
Then God Showed Up
It always amazes me when God orchestrates all the details of my life. When a sermon at church, the book I’m reading, and a friend’s encouraging words all contain the same message, I know it’s the Lord working. It probably shouldn’t surprise me, after all the same God who lives in me also controls the winds and the waves. But I love it that God sometimes shows off His tender love and His attention to detail, not because He’s flashy and wants attention, but because He wants us to know He is with us and cares about our daily thoughts, feelings, and experiences. In fact, I bet He’s always doing this, and I’d notice it more if I simply took the time to look.
In a typical God-synchronized way, just two days after reading my notice of rejection, He directed me to the following verses in John 10:2-5:
But the one who enters through the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep recognize his voice and come to him. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they know his voice. They won’t follow a stranger; they will run from him because they don’t know his voice.
Two Voices
There are two voices mentioned in this passage: the shepherd’s and the stranger’s. It says that the shepherd’s voice (Jesus) is recognizable to the sheep (us). It goes further and says that Jesus knows our names and calls us by name. And because they know His voice, the sheep follow the shepherd wherever He leads them.
In contrast, the sheep will not follow a stranger’s voice but instead will run from it. Notice it does not say the sheep did not hear the stranger’s voice, it says they ran from it.
When I read my rejection email and started to believe the voices telling me I was worthless and a fraud, I was following the stranger’s voice. The voice of a thief and robber (John 10:1) whose only purpose is destruction. I allowed my insecurities to distract me from the true Shepherd, Jesus, who calls me by my true name.
The Bible tells us we have many names and titles. Some of the names Jesus calls us include child, friend, beloved, saint, heir, righteous, chosen, adopted, forgiven… the list goes on and on. When I start hearing a voice calling me anything else, I have one job to do, RUN!
Following Jesus Beyond the Gate
The Lord showed me something else that morning in His scriptures. My first reaction to rejection and set back was doubt, fear, and all kinds of second guessing. But He showed me how the shepherd in this story took the sheep out of the pen. The sheep likely felt safe and secure there, protected from all outside dangers lurking just beyond the gate. But by following the Shepherd through the gate, they were able to partake in lush green pastures, fresh air, and room to graze all while under the protective care of their Shepherd.
Jesus does the same for us. He guides us out of our comfort zones into the unknown to build our faith and dependence all while providing His divine and complete protection.
Trusting God with the Outcome
Shortly after spiraling over my rejection, I contacted the person who invited me to speak. She made it clear that the event organizers want me to share the message God placed on my heart. Even though the credentialing board may not award continuing education credits for my session, the organizers are eager for me to speak, and they welcome my insights.
I know Jesus has given me an amazing opportunity to speak at this upcoming conference. I’ve seen Him orchestrate every detail like a masterfully played game of chess. He’s asking me to step out in faith and follow His voice through the gate into this new pasture. I know He goes before me. All I have to do is follow His voice, trust where He is leading and rest in the protection that only the true Shepherd can provide.
Questions to Consider
- Is the stranger’s voice unknown to you? What strangers’ voices may you be too familiar with? How can you turn up the volume of the Shepherd’s voice in your life?
- Is God calling you out of the pen (your comfort zone)? If so, where is he calling you?
- What is one thing you can do today to better recognize the voice of Jesus?
Want to read about another spiritual gate in my life? Check out my previous blog post on the transformational process of waiting called Trusting God on the Journey.